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MISFIRE'S STUFF

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SHAPE UP, HAVE GREAT FUN AND GET EXERCISE TOO!

(At a total cost of under twenty dollars!)

When I was a kid, I loved to ride my bike, slide down sliding boards, climb jungle gyms (or anything else that was handy), and generally enjoyed being a kid. Heck, when I had three kids of my own, I still couldn't pass up a deserted playground!

About a year ago, I developed what turned into constant sciatica. If you've never had it, it's a pinched nerve that sends excruciating pains running down your leg(s) from your hips. I was going to my friendly neighborhood (and VERY Italian) chiropractor two to three times a week. I also had problems with pain between my shoulder blades caused by a vertebrae that had been injured when my car was rear-ended at a Stop sign over 30 years ago. Although it all improved after every visit, it insisted on coming back.

About the same time, I'd lost 50 pounds and all my muscle tone in three months while battling my second round of cancer. My skin literally hung on me!

We have too many trees in our yard. BIG trees. They drop things that take every spare minute to keep raked up. All the estimates we've gotten for taking down the nine we'd like to lose, could each pay for a luxury Caribbean cruise!

One day I was looking at the trees in our back yard and decided I wanted a swing. Not a little swing. A swing that had ropes long enough to REALLY swing! I found an ideal branch about 20' up on a huge oak tree just outside our back door.

Where you'll hang it and who will put it up can be a problem though. You have to find a branch high enough, straight enough and strong enough. Also, hanging it from a tree branch, it either has to be a THICK branch or a very sturdy tree. Branches that seem good can droop if they're on a tree with soft wood like pine, or if it's hung too far out on the branch. A framework could be built for the swing if there is no tree available. I would suggest that it be made of either galvanized pipe at least two inches in diameter and the legs sunken into concrete, or treated 4" x 4" wood with the legs anchored to concrete bases by post anchors used to support the legs of raised decks. (Illustation) However, a good tree branch is MUCH easier.

I built the seat using a solid oak board, an inch thick, 24" long and 8" wide. I rounded the front and back edges so it would be comfortable. Then I drilled a 1/2" hole about an inch and a half from each corner for the ropes. It only took a minute or two of sanding to round the holes so they wouldn't cut into the ropes. Then I finished the board with a stain, a waterproofing sealer and three coats of polyurethane. Hey, it sounds like a lot of work, but it's only one board!

There is a DEFINITE top and bottom to any board, especially one that will be subjected to changes in temperature and humidity! Look at the end of the board. The grain should be FROWNING! If you leave the wrong side up, the board will eventually "cup" so the edges curl upward. In this case, a "smiling" board will not give YOU any reason to smile! KEEP THE FROWN GOING DOWN!

I used large marine strength nylon rope so it wouldn't be affected by weather. I threaded one length through each side of the board, tying a knot on the underside of each hole so it wouldn't slip. (Illustration) I also cut the ropes so they were at least 10 feet longer than the distance from the branch to the seat. It's cheap stuff and better to waste a little than ruin the whole thing.

Another knot was tied in each of the ropes about two feet above the swing seat. That way, after threading the rope through the seat, I could tie the short end of the ropes above the knot at the right height on each side to make the seat level. Note in the picture how the knot that comes up from the seat is tied over the knot that was tied in the length of rope that comes down from the branch. The knots above the seat keep the ropes tied above them from slipping down. And, it makes it possible for me to adjust the ropes if they stretch, which they tend to do at first. We burned the ends of the ropes and then wrapped them with duct tape to keep them from unraveling.

My husband, Bert, put it up for me and threaded the long sections of rope through some old garden hose that would protect the tree branch while keeping the rope from slipping on the branch and wearing out. He pulled the rope as tight as possible to be sure it wouldn't slide on the branch as the swing moved.

WOW! What a difference it made in my life! Even starting out slowly, within a week, the flab was tightening up! I was regaining my muscle tone! And best of all, NO MORE BACK PROBLEMS...AT ALL!

By swinging, I use almost all of my major muscles. And I don't have to swing any more than I can handle. At first, I started off slowly. I'd lean back some, but not as much as I could a week later. By the time I was fully extending my body, I could feel the muscles in my thighs, calves, arms, chest and abdomen tightening. But because I went at my own pace, there was NO PAIN and NO STRAIN! When you need a break, just let the swing give you a free ride until you're rested again!

IT'S GREAT FUN!

I told all six of my doctors about my swing. Every one of them including the chiropractor who called to find out why he hadn't seen me in months, said it was a great idea, one they would recommend to their patients who would benefit from it.

Besides being a great way to get into shape, the swing can go so high, it's like flying and soooo relaxing! WHO EVER HEARD OF NO PAIN, NO STRAIN EXERCISE THAT'S FUN?

Now all my friends want to come over and try my swing. But I had to make some rules.
1. You MUST share!
2. NO BAD WORDS ALLOWED!

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